Destructoid Changelog - The Road to Funkotron

The holidays are upon us. Sick of hearing Christmas music in department stores yet? Maybe not. I suppose I was somewhat nostalgic for it up until I worked a holiday season in retail in my early 20s. Now, I can hardly stand it.

I broke out my racing wheel this week. It’s never far, but I decided to accommodate it better. I got new wheels for my office chair that lock, so I won’t keep pushing myself back when I press the pedals. My go-to is, perhaps predictably, Euro Truck Simulator. Driving down the highway and listening to Duke Ellington is a type of self-care. I’d add to my playtime in My Summer Car, but I’m not sure I’m ready to put that heap back together. I also got Snowrunners.

Okay, maybe this is obvious, but Snowrunners is a game about getting stuck in mud. Maybe snow, as the title implies, but I haven’t made it through enough mud to find out. Every job is like, “Drive over this stretch of submerged road.” I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I’m not sure it was slowly fighting through deep muck for an hour to make it across 20 meters of terrain. I suppose I see the appeal.

It’s going to be a quiet couple of weeks on the site leading up to the New Year. If it’s too quiet, you can check out past issues of this newsletter over here. You can also check out some of Destructoid’s Game of the Year coverage at this tag.

Finally, remember that if you refer a friend to this newsletter using the link below, you will start receiving our monthly special edition newsletter, where I interview game developers. I’m still finalizing things, but this month, it will either be Ben Cocuzza of Puppet Combo (Stay Out of the House, Christmas Massacre) or Jack King-Spooner (Judero). If it’s not Puppet Combo or Jack King-Spooner this month, it will be Puppet Combo or Jack King-Spooner next month. Not set on the sequence, but either way, refer someone now, and you’ll get both interviews.

ToeJam & Earl III: Mission to Earth

Of all the series to use a roman numeral in their title, this one seems to fit least. ToeJam & Earl feel as though they’re a staple of the Sega Genesis/Mega Drive library, but not enough of a staple that I played it in my youth. I wanted to. The strange alien designs and weird names appealed to me. It wasn’t until I was maybe 19 that I finally got a chance on the Wii Virtual Console.

The sequel, ToeJam & Earl in Panic on Funkotron, was a good friend to me earlier this year with its laid-back but still challenging style. I then spun off into a playthrough of Back in the Groove, the most recent entry. Unfortunately, I had heard that ToeJam & Earl III: Mission to Earth for Xbox was stinky in a magazine I read back near its release. After playing Panic in Funkotron, I bought a copy, but didn’t play it right away. That’s partially because I don’t have my OG Xbox hooked up at all times. Also, I think I need to recap mine, but that’s a future Zoey problem.

With it plugged in for Tony Hawk, I decided to finally try TJ&EIII, and I’m almost offended by how much I don’t hate it. Despite its reputation, I actually like it in the same way that I enjoy the other games in the series. To be fair, the reviews for it at launch were more lukewarm than they were negative, but I was still prepared for the worst. I thought I’d hate the emphasis on hip-hop, I was afraid that it wasn’t going to be in any way similar to the Genesis games, and I also thought I’d hate Latisha, the third character they added. All mere assumptions that turned out to not be true.

I’m not saying that ToeJam & Earl III is a great game. What I’m saying is that it’s ToeJam & Earl, which I’ve found not everyone digs, and that may account for some of the more lukewarm or negative reviews. The games are slow-paced affairs that focus on exploration. You need to have a tolerance – or even an affection – for wandering. You also typically have to be patient enough to deal with setbacks.

ToeJam & Earl III is somewhat similar to the first game. As the name implies, the aliens return to Earth, which is a twisted and abstract representation of our planet. Humankind is represented using a variety of bizarre stereotypes, like women with shopping carts or nerds with remote-controlled UFOs. You pick up items in the form of presents that can be used to defend yourself, attack the humans, or allow you to traverse gaps and bodies of water.

One of the big hooks of the first game was the way that it randomly generated its levels. But while TJ&EIII drops the stacked levels in favor of a level-based hubworld, you can still choose to play in randomly generated levels. I haven’t tried it yet, as I’m still working my way through the standard story mode, but I appreciate that they included it since it’s one of the unique aspects that give it character.

One of the biggest divergences from the first game, however, is the fact that combat plays a greater role. Your immediate objective is to collect Lamont the Funkopotamous’ lost vinyl albums, but later, you learn you need to stop the Anti-Funk from eliminating all the universe’s funk, so you need to stop him. You also need to convert humans to the ways of funk, and you do that with violence. Indoctrinating them makes them very pleasant and friendly, but weirdly feels like you’re also robbing them of free will.

But, yeah, there’s a hip-hop angle here. Despite referring specifically to funk, I think hip-hop has always been part of the series, but now you have to hear the vernacular and listen to the characters rap. There are also gospel singers that introduce all the levels for some reason. It can seem awkward, but I didn’t hate it. Latisha didn’t feel as out of place as I thought she would, but she kind of feels like a token female character.

Overall, I understand why every game in the ToeJam and Earl series has gotten somewhat mixed reviews. The premise isn’t exactly exciting, and it moves slowly. It’s a vibe, though. Sometimes, you just need something gelatinous you can sink into; something that is relaxed but not without challenge. What I mean is: if you already know you like ToeJam & Earl, then it’s safe to play ToeJam & Earl III in spite of its reputation. It might not become your favorite in the series, but it’s not the besmirchment it’s sometimes made out to be.

Elsewhere on Destructoid

Dungeons & Dragons: Dark Alliance is getting delisted next year, even though there’s an offline mode

“The future is amazing,” is something I’ve said out loud more than once in the past couple of weeks. Sarcastically, I mean. We live in absolutely ridiculous times. If you need another example, Dungeons & Dragons: Dark Alliance is being delisted. It looks like a licensed game, so you might think that’s rather short-lived but expected. However, the publisher is actually the property owner: Wizards of the Coast. So, they don’t have to re-license just to sell it. The reason is apparently because the servers are going down, but you could always play single-player. They had announced they were going to add split-screen, but they never did.

I remember Dark Alliance pretty well because it was a review I did early as a regular writer on Destructoid. More importantly, it was one of the first “big” reviews I did for the site; a review of something that was full price and you could find on a shelf. It was also the first one that I was asked if I could cover, which made me feel kind of important. I hated it. Bland at best, but there was plenty in there that I found tedious and annoying. Good times.

Indiana Jones and the Great Circle patch fixes a bug where players couldn’t equip Indy’s whip

This is one of those articles where the important bits are unavoidably given in the headline, but I find it to be pretty funny. I’m not entirely sure what the whole criteria is to lock away Indy’s whip, but that’s a showstopper, right there.

Judero devs announce Mashina, are launching a Kickstarter to fund it

Oh, hey, we were just talking about this guy (but not his co-developer who is also working on this game). I’ve got an interview done and chambered for our monthly special edition. There isn’t a whole lot of information on Judero’s follow-up, Mashina. That is aside from the fact that it stars a round robot. I guess there’s a bit more known, and there’s a teaser trailer to check out.

Unpacking developer slams the Nintendo eShop for allowing scammy copycats

It’s nice to see this problem get the spotlight now, but it’s been an issue on the eShop for years. One would almost expect Nintendo to build a walled garden for their online marketplace, but that’s not what happened. The eShop resembles any smartphone storefront, so loaded with low-effort junk that is often just intended to deceive. In this case, it looks as though someone is deliberately trying to get people to mistakenly buy their game by disguising it to look like deluxe editions of Unpacking. Someone went to the effort to learn how to make games and chose to use it for evil.

The eShop sucks. To find something, I first need to know it exists, and then I need to use search to find it. I don’t even search on the Switch, either. I go through the website on PC because it’s faster. I recall people (myself included) giving the eShop a pass when the Switch was first released because everyone thought Nintendo would improve it with time, but that didn’t happen, and now it’s full of garbage.

Reviews for review this week

Nothing

Sorry, it’s not a game called nothing; there were no reviews this week. Things will be low-key until the new year. Here’s something: I’ve been playing Receiver 2. You know, that realistic gun game where you have to clear jams and stuff? It’s great. I’ve reached the last level and lost because I shot myself taking my gun out of my pocket. I’m serious. I haven’t completed it because I keep making stupid mistakes. It’s great, though, you should play it.