Destructoid Changelog - And Somehow, Uwe Boll Returns

Hey Hey! Welcome back to the Destructoid Changelog Newsletter. Things are finally picking up on the site, but we aren’t fully back up to speed yet. Still, like, at least there’s more stuff to highlight this week.

I’ve been mostly relaxing by playing arcade games and learning to drive stick in My Summer Car. I think I’m doing pretty well. I still make mistakes, but I don’t think I’d destroy a gearbox if I had to make a getaway or something.

Hey! Do you like (a chance to win) free stuff? Well, we’re giving away a PlayStation 5 Slim, and you already meet the main requirement for entering, which is to be subscribed to this newsletter. Also, you need to be over 18. But the contest is open worldwide (void where prohibited by law). You can enter right here at this link.

And also, remember to refer your friends using the link below. Doing so gets you on a list – the kind you want to be on! If you’ve made a referral, you will start receiving our monthly special edition newsletter, which contains an insightful interview with a developer in the trenches. Interviews you won’t find anywhere else with folks like Ben Cocuzza of Puppet Combo and Jack King-Spooner of Judero fame. Just the best people. That’s a prize you can’t put a price tag on, unlike a PlayStation 5 Slim, which does have an MSRP.

OutRun 2006: Coast 2 Coast

If you even mention OutRun, I get Splash Wave stuck in my head. I’ve listened to that tune about a jillion times now, and it still hasn’t got old. I love OutRun. As much as I respect Yu Suzuki, I think it’s his only production that I truly love without exception. Okay, maybe Rad Mobile deserves to be on that list.

However, it’s something I wouldn’t have expected to make a good transfer to 3D, but 2003’s OutRun 2 somehow managed to prove that the original didn’t shine just as the best use of the pseudo-3D raster effect. And that was great already, but OutRun 2006: Coast 2 Coast is an expanded version of that. And that is also great as is, but a group of fans put together OutRun2006Tweaks; a big package of fixes that bring the PC version up to modern standards. That is to say, it smooths out graphical problems, increases the framerate, and just makes it more comfortable to play on new PC operating systems. I don’t know what your modern standards are.

You can get the standard OutRun experience in OutRun 2006: Coast 2 Coast, sure. The whole branching sprint to the finish line formula that has you merely dodging traffic; that’s your foundation. And you can play just that mode, but in order to make it a more console-like experience, there are also individual challenges and races.

One of the side modes is absolutely hilarious. You essentially have to keep your girlfriend happy in the ways you probably expect. You know how to keep a woman happy, don’t you? It’s by driving fast, drifting, running over ghosts, or committing vehicular manslaughter. That’s what a woman wants.

I’m not exaggerating here, either. You know how you always had a lady in the passenger seat in the original OutRun? There are modes where she becomes more vocal, so you’ll get challenges up to three times in each segment of a race. And some of them are actually just to pass a number of cars, but then there are weirder ones.

It was surprising the first time she told me to dodge the meteors and giant hunks of rock started falling from the sky and embedding themselves in the road. Listen, I can’t speak for all the ladies in the world, but I personally appreciate when someone swerves to avoid deadly space rocks. Not just romantically, but existentially.

That’s maybe where OutRun 2006 really diverges from the original OutRun: it’s kind of goofy. Not that OutRun was entirely serious, but it didn’t have the threat of being hit by space rocks. Even in normal OutRun mode, OutRun 2006 has a really weird concept of travel, where one moment you’re in the Arctic, and the next in Cape Kennedy. You can also do some absolutely incredible drifts.

But that also feels like turn-of-the-millenium Sega (also, it fits with earlier sequels like OutRunners). The tail end of their Dreamcast era. It fits in with Crazy Taxi and Space Channel 5; a big neon sign right before a wave of drab, realism-focused games crashed down on the industry. Right before the decline of even Japan’s lively Game Center scene. Those were good times.

Elsewhere on Destructoid

Armie Hammer attempts bizarre comeback in The Dark Knight… by Uwe Boll

If this sounds like this isn’t video game-related, then congratulations on not knowing who Uwe Boll is. Unfortunately, I have to ruin it by telling you that he’s a guy who directed some of the most absolutely, irredeemably awful video game movies, including Postal, Bloodrayne, Alone in the Dark, and some others that I haven’t watched because I was raised better than that. His new movie, The Dark Knight, has nothing to do with video games or Batman, thankfully. But it does have Armie Hammer, who I’m happy to only be learning about right now. Wild stuff.

Tiago Manuel has an amusing write-up that you should check out. He does a great job of making light of a terrible, terrible situation.

Explore the more cultured side of Doom with this art gallery mod

Weird Doom mods are the best, and Andrew Heaton keeps his fingers firmly planted on that pulse. And this art gallery mod is weird enough on its own, but Mr. Heaton also embedded a tweet by Jasozz (of Cultic fame) with a video of an edit he made himself. Jasozz figured the mod would be even better if Doomguy’s interaction grunt was left in. So, he added it, but slowed it down so it sounds like he’s deeply appreciating the art. I laughed. Giggled even. Definitely check it out.

Apple reportedly halted production of the ridiculously expensive Apple Vision Pro because of poor demand

We’ve really learned nothing from Google Glass. Let me back that up a smidge; tech executives really learned nothing from Google Glass. Augmented reality is niche. Virtual reality is niche. If you want people to try it and make it less of a niche, you need to make it accessible. You know, like my dealer always tells me: the first hit is free. But instead, they priced their Apple Vision Pro at $3,500 which isn’t even competitive against the most expensive VR headset. Listen, if you gave me $3,500, it would measurably improve my life. I’d have to save for, like, two years to safely afford that, and the human body can’t take that much instant ramen.

So, it certainly doesn’t surprise me that, as Mr. Manuel reports, Apple is scaling back its ambitions on the device. They’re still reportedly working on a Gen 2, and if they go through with it, I hope they think about their strategy. The people who spend money on these things are rarely rich people who like to be on the cutting edge; it’s people with bad spending habits, and a $3,500 pricetag isn’t anywhere near impulse buy territory.

Reviews for review this week

Freedom Wars Remastered

Oh, finally. A new review. This one comes from Steven “Upward Mobility” Mills, and it’s on a remaster of a game you might recognize from lists with names like “PlayStation Vita games you should play before the store shuts down” (which didn’t happen, thankfully). If you’re not a handheld player or don’t own a Vita, well, you’re in luck since Freedom Wars Remaster is also freedom from the Vita.

Apparently, it’s good! I always heard of it as a post-apocalyptic Monster Hunter, which is essentially how Mr. Mills describes it. 30 hours? Maybe I’ll do that one day. Sounds fab.